It's been written about many times before, by both sides of the argument, but right now I feel the need to vent.

When my totalitarian regime sweeps into power, smokers will long for the day when all they were forced to do was take their filthy habit outside.

When I'm in power, Philip Morris et al will be run out of town, and will only be permitted in specially constructed air-tight pods. Hey, at least that way the wretches will get the full benefit of their . First and second-hand smoke, all in one go!

Of course I'm generalising about all smokers. Obviously there are considerate and inconsiderate smokers, but that sort of concern for accuracy doesn't sell newspapers web page hits.

I have friends who smoke, and every one of them is as considerate as it's possible to be, but as with any group in society, it's the jerks that grab the attention.

So, anyway, it's a perfect, warm, sunny day, the neighbourhood looks as cute as ever, and Miles and I have hied ourselves the short walk to Stella's Coffee Haus. We're sat on the porch there, as I write, and everything is perfect, except for one thing.

The occupant on the next table is , and said smoke is drifting (as you'd expect) in our direction.

Of course there are plenty of smokers out there who will now chime in with the traditional refrains, along the lines of, "Quit whining, there's no proof second-hand smoke is harmful" (Hint), or, "Hey, I don't have a problem with you drinking. is MY vice, leave me alone."

Well you know what? If you want to smoke yourself into an early grave, that's just fine and dandy with me. We'll be down one more walking ashtray, big whoop. However the difference between your and my drinking, is that when I drink alcohol, the only person who's affected by it is me.

I don't get violent or abusive when drunk, I don't drive, and I don't get loud and disturb the neighbourhood peace either. As I said, the only person whom I affect is me. Not so with smokers.

Of course the smokers reading this will cite alcoholics and drunk drivers as harming society, but these are people who take alcohol to excess. Smokers start polluting the lives of others even when they do it in moderation.

And as for the, "Well, I'm outside so why shouldn't I smoke?" thing, if it's still invading my lungs and eyes then it's still rude and inconsiderate. Yes, you can't help which way the wind blows, but you can help the fact that you're around other people. You could just try refraining from your vile habit for five fucking minutes. Of course I realise that would require some sort of will-power, or indeed giving a shit about anyone but yourself.

I mean, I try to be considerate about the rights, needs and wishes of my fellow man, but really, I don't think this has to apply to . It is a disgusting, unnecessary and dangerous habit, that harms not only the person doing it, but those around them. Not only that, but it smells bad.

You may say, "well if you outlaw it, then the price will go up and so will crime.", but I think on the whole a lot of law-abiding folks might use it as the impetus to finally quit. Besides, if I get my wallet snatched by a smoker, the foot-chase should be fairly easy for me. I'm guessing they'll need to stop for a sit-down before I do.

I know this is a controversial topic, but I'll stop bitching about it, the day smokers take a break for the sake of others. And no, I'm not talking about a cigarette break.